Saturday, September 28, 2019

The Two Facets of Sixty !!



Sobha Palladian is a wonderful place!
It has a wonderful mix of people across all ages.
Starting from infants and yet-to-be-born infants to 93 year old veterans!!
And there would be more senior citizens than juniors under 18 years!

And amongst the SrCz’s we have a good number of defense folks who have seen action in the battlefields, corporate honchos who have played war games in the boardrooms, and many ‘Pros’ who have fought against market forces, competition and managed intricate political designs to succeed and get to where they have reached.
And now all of them are happily settled in Sobha Palladian!!

And if  you could compare what they were in their ‘hey-days’ to what they are today, it would be a very interesting study.
My life is one such case study.

I crossed 60 four years back.
And I have changed quite a bit.

Between 22 to 59 years, that’s 37 years, I worked in a corporate.
Chasing numbers, living (surviving) from one quarter to the next, year after year.
I have seen much action. Been there, Done that! Many times.

It had been a furious rat race. And many times I have been in the lead pack.
And that meant I was one fat & mean rat!!
And in my eagerness to win and win it all, I have done many unpleasant things. Some out of sheer desperation and some for that sadistic pleasure of beating the S%*! out of the adversary!

At times I have been ruthless, arrogant, unforgiving, impatient  and a self important snob!
And my lifestyle played along with this attitude. Working hard & playing hard.
Smoking more than a pack a day, I have also gone overboard over my coffee and drinks.. Until the docs found dark patches in my lungs. And gave me a choice between the red-pill and the green-pill (Matrix style)
By the way have you tried that beer made from Basmati? TOIT used to serve some years back.

And that does not mean I have not done my bit of  good deeds.
I have done more than my share of hiring promising freshmen, coaching them and nurturing their careers. And I am proud that many of them today head big companies and country businesses. I have helped out large number of customers in tight situations, bending company guidelines  and relaxing warranty policies  and a few of CSR activities as well.

And I have equally taken pleasure in trampling people’s toes,  driving hard bargains, beating the h@!! out of competition with guerrilla marketing, under-cutting deals, poaching channel partners etc etc etc..

And now, when I look back at all these misdemeanors, I feel sad.
What if I had not done those unpleasant  things.
I am sure I would have still survived.  Maybe I would have missed a couple of opportunities.  But that would not have made me any poorer.
Nor would I have gone  hungry any day.

And as I get older, subconsciously I seem to be making amends to some of those misdirected actions. Maybe  to atone myself ? Prayashchit ??
And  so I have changed !!

 And here I am generously borrowing from a wonderful  Whats App message that has been doing the rounds for quite some time. Unfortunately I do not know who is the original author so that I could give him/her the due credit and ask permission to use the material.  You may recognize some of what I say …
  
I am no longer all that important. I am not at the center of the universe and the world does not rest on my shoulders anymore !

I have stopped bargaining with vegetables & fruits vendors. A few Rupees more is not going to burn a hole in my pocket but might mean a lot more to them. But I do bargain for a fair price to bring down the price of that croton plant and the ceramic pot from the astronomical price quoted. And I may pay a little more depending on the way these folks behave & bargain.
I do not insist on getting the odd change from Auto and Tax drivers. Thankfully Paytm has solved most of this challenge now.

The other day I could not find a five rupee coin  nor a ten rupee note. So I gave a 50/- rupee note to the  pathetic & disheveled beggar woman outside the temple. The surprised look of delight and the shower of blessings I got in return were priceless!

I stopped telling my 90 year dad that he had  already narrated that story many times. After all, the story makes him walk down the memory lane & re-live his past. And I am happy for him.

I do not correct people even when I know they are wrong. Why spoil their fun or their beliefs. If they are happy and it does not hurt me, its peace!

I give compliments freely & generously. And I give all feedback ratings  a perfect 10!
While I do point out any deficiencies clearly and raise it up to the managers, my final score is always a 10. I believe detailed and qualitative feedback are more useful for improvement than numbers for a bar chart.

I do not bother about my clothes combination anymore. Blue jeans and white shirts/ kurta make up most of my wardrobe. A crease or a stain on my shirt/pant does not upset me anymore.
And I have happily given away most of my blazers and suits and my collection of Laptop cum overnight strolley bags. And most of them to Nepali cowkidaars and security guards from north east, when they go back to visit their families . 
I can never imagine doing this 10 years back !

And my collections watches and pens and those fancy raw silk & pure cotton ties.
Once upon a time I would meticulously keep track & gloat over them and lovingly clean/polish/press them every few months. Now they are just scattered in my closet in some corner and I am not bothered even if a few are missing.
And I have surprised a few of my relatives’s kids by presenting them one of my fancy watches or pens . And I would hand then a 500 rupee note telling them to buy a new original refill or a battery cell.
 I do not need them now. I have all the time in the world and all my writing is on my PC MS Word  set to Calibri 16 font size!!
  
I remain cool when someone jumps the queue at the checkout counter.
And I no longer throw an abuse or curse at the impatient and ill-tempered Call-center cab drivers when they sit on their horns and try to overtake me from the left. ‘Wonder why he Is so eager to reach his FINAL destination so soon’, is my only observation.

I answer all kids questions patiently. I have been asked “when is library open ?’ a hundred times. And I am happy to answer in details each time.

Yes, I am changing.

I've learnt to live each day as if it's the last. And one day it will be my last. And until that day every hour is a present!!
I am doing what makes me (Jayanthi included) happy. After all, I am responsible for my happiness, and I owe it to me.

And I must call up all my near and remote relatives and make time to visit all those ones who are in town and nearby.
Yes, I must make up for all those lost times and opportunities!

Krish..

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